New Tunes Tuesday: June 14, 2016

I didn’t get New Music Monday all wrapped up for this week, so we’ve fallen over into the second instalment of New Tunes Tuesday!

Tuesday is the second best day of the week that starts with T!

Brandy Clark – Big Day In A Small Town
This hews pretty closely to a classic Country-pop formula on the border of Inoffensiveville but really lives in Unremarkabletown. The gentle stomp and playful lyrics about how nice it is to be a small-towner will surely appeal to both people from small towns and people living in cities who drive pickup trucks for no practical reason. It’s hokey. It’s goofy. She mentions shooting a deer. But this music is for somebody, and I don’t think that’s a terrible thing. The only thing I truly hate about it is the very strange production choice to have a repeated vocal sample in the background that is somewhere between Mahna Mahna and the guy that says “jitterbug” in Wake Me Up Before You Go Go. What the fuck were they thinking?

Fitz and the Tantrums – Fitz and the Tantrums
Hahahaha. I hate this so much. Everything about it is terrible. Wow. I could see this getting very popular. It’s got hand clapping prompts in it and people are idiots. Solid formula. This guy looks exactly like Taran Killem.

Band Of Horses – Why Are You Okay?
LYRIC VIDEO ALERT!!! A long time ago I had a ticket to see Pavement on Toronto Island. I was pretty excited, because I hadn’t gotten a chance to see them in the 90s. Also on the bill were Broken Social Scene (a band I loathe) and this band. I listened to them play one song and then went to sit under a tree until they were finished playing. It took forever. Then BSS played and it seemed to take even longer. I found both bands incredibly boring, but not boring in the way that one could just tune it out and have a nap. Boring like waiting in line to get your health card renewed in a stuffy Service Ontario office while the person waiting behind you keeps nudging way too close.

Anyway, I don’t like this band and I think this song is boring. You might like it.

Nick Jonas – Last Year Was Complicated
This song is about the act of cooking bacon being better than being with whoever Nick Jonas’s last partner was. I cannot believe that this is not a joke song. I’m glad that this young millionaire is able to appreciate his freedom and really spread his wings. It must have been rough prior to this. You know… being a young millionaire who didn’t cook his own bacon. Or something.

This is bad music.

Garbage – Strange Little Birds
Holy shit. Garbage is back. This song is the 90s-est sounding thing I’ve heard since… the 90s – when Shirley Manson was on the cover of a magazine licking Gavin Rossdale’s face. With the exception of a pretty fun bridge section, this is a bummer slog just like it was in the 90s. Shirley is apparently “so empty”. Important insights, 20 years on. Somehow this lyrical content – which was so common two decades ago – just sounds silly and whiney in the ears of an adult.

The Garbage backing band looked like old dudes back in the 90s, but now they all basically look like different sizes and shapes of an elderly Elvis Costello. Shirley Manson is now the 50 year old punk lady that you feel simultaneously glad to know and sorry for. The world didn’t need a new Garbage record.

It needed a new Republica record. Idiots.

Tom Odell – Wrong Crowd
We need to put an end to men from Britain that play the piano. There. I said it.

This falls into some valley between bad Bowie impersonation, bad Coldplay impersonation and terrible Arcade Fire impersonation. What does “indie rock” mean in 2016?

Frankie Ballard – El Rio
Instead of doing the typical country song thing and singing about his dog and his pickup truck, Frankie Ballard sings about his dog and an El Camino. Also, in stark contrast to the other country song I’ve listened to today, this claims that a small town isn’t country enough. Instead, he apparently wants to drive his dog out to the desert. To… I don’t know… honky tonk with it or something. This is mega-slick country rock, calculated and predictable. I think I know why Frankie turned the comments section off on his YouTube clip… He wouldn’t be able to handle all of the praise that would come his way otherwise! Praise for the cute dog in this video instead of his bad song, I mean. He wouldn’t be able to handle that.

Dexys Midnight Runners – Let The Record Show: Dexys Do Irish and Country Soul
This offers me plenty of things to be confused about! For one, Dexys Midnight Runners are still a band! I suppose an album of Irish standards makes a reasonable amount of sense, insofar that none of this makes any sense. They sound suitably drunk and it makes this recording both fun to listen to and impossible to listen to. Great pants.

Eearring – Tunn Star
I was sort of getting into the slow-core vibe of this track until buddy started singing. It sounds like a guy got dumped, got drunk, puked on himself and now he’s sad-crooning in the shower. No thanks.

Evans the Death – Vanilla
This has a post-rock edge that I think is pretty fun. If I were to see this kind of thing at a local rock show, I would probably be impressed. It isn’t going to be everybody’s cup of tea, but it’s noisy and strange. Yeah. I’m into this. Hurray!

The Gotobeds – Blood//Sugar//Secs//Traffic
Probably the best album title I’ve seen in years. The music is fairly energetic and fun. Jangly punked-out rock n’ roll. The vocal affectations may need to grow on me, but musically this is up my alley. I wonder if I’m giving this a break because I think their album title is so funny? Who cares.

Sumac – What One Becomes
The thing that’s nice about music is that I can write really mean things about things that I think are bad on my blog, and the people that like those things are probably off saying really mean things about some of the things that I like. This is probably one of those things. Because I think it is so fun. Sludgy and noisy and great. And it is probably unlistenable to all of the jerks who love that Tom Odell asshole.

THERE IS STRENGTH IN OUR DIFFERENCE, EVERYONE.

Allen Toussaint – American Tunes
THIS FUCKING SLAYS.

Have a great week, everybody.

 

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s